Is it Normal to have SEX Once to Twice a Month?

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Question by you.wontregretthis: Is it Normal to have SEX Once to Twice a Month?
M girlfriend and I have bee dating for 3 years. For the past year or so the sex as virtually disappeared. We use to do it like rabbits when we first started dating, then it went down to about 1-2 times a weeks, and now for the past year or so it has been like once every 2-3 weeks, sometimes even more.

I have brought it up before that we are a young couple Me 23, Her 25 and that it is not normal to be having sex that infrequently. She then proceeded to ask me how often would I like it, i replied ” 2-4 times a week would be great :)”. She got all upset at my answer and said so I’ll just lie here and hold my legs up for you…. that was the end of that for a while.

I brought it up again later with a little more progress and questioned her about how frequent she things that a couple in their mid-twenties should be have sex. She replied once a week….

I dont’ know what to do. I am a very sexual person and I am not happy with this aspect of the relationship. It seems that when I bring it up there is no change. She doesn’t want to have sex, and she won’t let me watch porn (sparks up a big argument), so I put forth a lot of effort to not watch it.

I’ve asked her if she enjoys the sex, or if its me, and she says that all of that is good, she “just was not raised that way” to be a sexual person.

Is there anything you can suggest to help me in this dilemma


Furthermore, she does not work, does not know how to cook, so:
A) can’t beat her home
B) i always wait on her
C) when we do have sex it always is about her, never me

Feel free to answer in the comment section below

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7 Responses to Is it Normal to have SEX Once to Twice a Month?

  1. masturbate.

    im just a woman!!
    February 21, 2014 at 11:07 pm

  2. do things to get her in the mood more often do things that will make her not b able to resist u. Try romantic things

    February 21, 2014 at 11:30 pm

  3. Best thing to do in this case is make her feel sexy. Show her you still think shes extremely desirable and the rest will happen. Gotta keep the romance going or it will only happen even less. I suggest beating her home from work one day with a dozen (Maybe 2) roses and having a nice dinner with candles waiting for her. and remember, The little things go a long way to a woman.

    February 22, 2014 at 12:25 am

  4. i know it’s hard (no pun intended) but you have to just keep talking to her. if she is unwilling to be tolerant then you have deeper issues. she could be bothered by something at work or, girls are very competitive, if she feels inadequate when she compares herself to her friends then that could lower her sex drive and her self esteem, making her defensive when you try to talk.
    good luck

    not a boy
    February 22, 2014 at 12:47 am

  5. Try to romance her, make it more about love than sex for her. See if that helps maybe. Play games, have longer foreplay. Please HER, just make it all about her sometimes. Women like to feel desired and needed and loved. There might be something wrong in other areas of your relationship also, but if she says that its just the way she was raised then I wouldnt worry about it. Since it is a big part of a relationship then it might just not work out unless you guys can compromise.

    Add: After reading your additions i say its time to leave. It really doesnt sound like she is offering you anything. She is too young to realize a good thing.

    Kiely M
    February 22, 2014 at 12:57 am

  6. This is an extremely common issue. I just went through it myself not to long ago. Everytime I brought it up there was some smart a$ $ comment made by her about it or it would turn to a fight. I dont honestly know what happens with women, they start off as such sexual creatures in the beginning until they get you nice and hooked, then deprive you of part of the reason that you two connect the way that you do…or did rather. I know that sex isnt everything in a relationship, but if a person no longer shows any interest in you sexually it will leave you with a feeling of not being wanted, unappreciated, and like you are no longer attractive.
    I have friends of mine that are woman that have been with there men for 3 to 6 years. All of these women say that there sex life, while not the same as what it was the first 6 months of their relationship, is still very active. At least twice a week. From what they told me, the only reason a woman no longer wants it is because she has become comfortable to a point where there is no lust remaining, or simply she no longer finds you attractive enough to have the urges she once did.
    While sex is not the primary basis of a relationship, it is very important. You must find someone that has the same libido as you or you will go through life feeling like you do now. That is the realization that I came to. I was deeply in love with the woman I was with, but I have urges and needs that werent being fulfilled and left me feeling like I wasnt worth as much to her as I once was or as she is to me.

    February 22, 2014 at 1:08 am

  7. Try a different approach… Maybe go up to her and hug her ask her how her day was, what she did all day (while holding her) then maybe give her a kiss on the cheeck, neck, lips. Keep on talking to her maybe tell her how your day was… slowly turn her on dont go right to “lets have sex” make it all about her… you can also give her a massage or something that she will love… when you get to it, do it the way she likes it and show her a good time…. She will then realize that you do care about her and hopefully she will do it to you…

    Hope it helps

    Good Luck!

    .: Yesi :.
    February 22, 2014 at 1:36 am

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